memories

Middle School Shotput Extraordinaire

Once a year, my junior high school decided that going through puberty in a giant cinderblock building surrounded by other…

2 years ago

Adventures in Babysitting Terrible Sneaky Monster Children

When I was fourteen years old, I suddenly found myself in need of some extra spending money. I was too…

4 years ago

A Brief Introduction to my Six-Year Blood Feud With C-3PO

In the spring of 2014, I attended the Calgary Comic and Entertainment Expo in Calgary, Alberta, partially because I am…

4 years ago

Ask a Canadian if “Threatening to Move to Canada” is Right For You

Every time there is a major social or political change in the United States, the Internet floods with panicked Americans…

5 years ago

A Field Guide to the Creatures of New York City, Chapter 1: Peanut Butter Girl

On a sunny Saturday in September, my boyfriend and I decided to take the N train from his apartment in…

5 years ago

Tales from the Trenches of Tech Support Hell

The summer between my second and third year of university, I worked in the computer department of a big-box office…

5 years ago

How I Almost Took a High School Field Trip to the Afterlife: Part Two

When we left off last week, I was standing in a parking lot with a dozen other teens who were…

5 years ago

How I Almost Took a High School Field Trip to the Afterlife: Part One

Like many other strapping, red-blooded Canadian youth, I spent my teenage years participating in the Duke of Edinburgh's International Award…

5 years ago

How to Convince New Yorkers That You’re One of Them, and Not Just a Lost Tourist from the Suburbs

The summer before I turned 25, I quit my job, packed my things, and moved from Edmonton, Canada, to New…

5 years ago

An Introduction to My Family’s Long, Ongoing Failed Experiment With Designer Dogs

When I was eleven years old, my family finally got the one thing that was missing from my Thomas-Kinkade-painting suburban…

6 years ago

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